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Patience by Maria d'Silva

"Be patient!" he says. I mean, excuse me but we have been going out for five years three months and eighteen days (not that I'm counting). "What's the rush - you're not going anywhere are you?" Well, actually now you mention it, I might! Marriage, it's a funny thing. I never thought too much about it before but lately I can't seem to escape it. Work colleagues seem to be getting engaged out of the blue, I pick up a magazine and there are wedding features, I can't even escape it when I watch soaps on television! Don't get me wrong, you may think the only reason I want to get married is because everyone else seems to be doing it. That's not the case at all. I know it is the right time for us, in fact I couldn't be more certain. The reason why I know this is not because it will be 'the next stage' in our relationship it is because I now know that I have taken too much for granted in the past and well, I just can't live without him. I know what you're saying, you've just realised this? The answer is yes and mainly due to the near death experience I had at the end of last year. I caught meningitis out of the blue and was rushed into intensive care where I was given last rites as the doctors did not know if I was going to pull through or not. Of course, I was completely oblivious to the whole thing and so was quite puzzled when I woke up in a hospital bed. I suffered a slight stroke which affected my sight and balance for a while but to cut a long story short, I have made a good recovery mainly due to my impatience and insistence of getting back to normal! I have always been a fighter but I was quite surprised by the way I was so overcome with emotion throughout the whole ordeal. I guess I had too much time to think about things, well life in general to be exact. I never thought it'd happen to me. What really got to me was the fact that I nearly didn't get the chance to tell those who were close to me how much I thought of them. This has always been one of my greatest fears and it so nearly became a reality. That is why I wrote a card expressing my feelings to all my family and my boyfriend and made them promise not to show anyone else the card. This is why I want to get married. We do have different perceptions of marriage however that may amuse you. He thinks that once we get engaged we'll get married within a couple of months and then make a baby on our honeymoon! Hmm, my view is, I have to say, more relaxed. I know that it will take months of planning for a wedding (something he seems unable to grasp) and then when we are married we can enjoy married life for a while and then settle down and have children. I mean who's rushing now! Patient - that's my middle name. I know he is the love of my life as I have told him all my deepest secrets and he still loves me. Not only is he the most gorgeous man I know he is the funniest and most charismatic person I think I will ever meet and I feel honoured that he is also my best friend. He is also the stubbornest person I know (even more than me which is a first) but I wouldn't change a thing about him. Well, perhaps only one or two things, the fact that he leaves his wet towel on the bed (which drives me insane) and that he is so often patient about everything! One thing I have learnt over the past few months is that old saying "You don't know what's round the corner" is so true. I know what I want and am going to try my best to turn my dream into a reality. It is the twenty-first century after all and sometimes women just have to take charge and yes, I want my princess wedding!

© 2004 Maria d'Silva

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